I am interrupting the
happiness blog series to bring you all some very happy news! I am four months
pregnant. I started IUI (like IVF, but less invasive) in May and my first
attempt was successful. So, I bet you have some questions! I have some answers:
When
are you due?
Mid February, 2019. Possible
valentine baby.
Is
it a boy or a girl?
Still not sure! I am having
a scan in about a week that will hopefully shed light on the issue.
Do
you have names picked out?
I have a short list. They're
all pretty traditional.
Who
is the father?
Me! Obviously. My children
will know me as Dad.
Who
is the other parent?
The donor parent was part of
an anonymous donor register from the USA. I selected him based on his profile
and essays on the donor company's website. When the children are 18, they will
have the option of contacting him, if they wish. I have never met, or spoken
to, the donor.
So,
you'll be a single dad?
Yep. My mother did a
fantastic job as a single mother, so I am not worried. In fact, I have a lot of
friends who are outstanding human beings who were raised by single parents. And
I know some outrageous scumbags who had two parents, so let's not have this
debate, okay?
Why
did you decide to have kids?
I have always wanted
children. I decided to have them now for two reasons. 1. I am 33 and looking
young on the outside doesn't make me young on the inside and 2. I want to start
HRT and it causes a lot of fertility issues. Not to mention, it would be
impossible to breast feed after I have top surgery.
It was now or never. And
never wasn't an option.
Will
you be chest feeding?
Yes. But as soon as that is
done, I will be starting HRT and having top surgery. The sooner I can get these
flapping milk factories off me, the better.
Will
you be vaccinating?
Of course. My children will
receive all their vaccines on the recommended schedule, just like I did.
Will
you be raising your children gender neutral?
I will in the sense that
when they are babies, I will not put them in gendered clothes. This is because
I don't want strangers knowing what my children's genitals look like. People
start treating boys and girls very differently from the moment they are born,
and I will do my best to avoid that sort of mental pollution.
I will also be keeping the
house free of any toys I feel push gender stereotypes, and they will not be
allowed to watch harmful gendering on TV or movies. That means most Disney
movies are out.
If you are confused, I will
give you an example:
Plastic cooking set in
primary colours? Fantastic.
Plastic cooking set in bring
pinks and pastel purple? Bad.
What
if they like classically gendered toys?
I could talk fluently by 18
months old. I am sure my children will /loudly/ voice their opinions on the
matter. Let's assume they don't need you fighting that battle for them.
Will
you be raising your child with gender neutral pronouns?
No. Even though I know /a
lot/ of trans people, generally speaking, trans people aren't all that common.
It is very likely my children will grow up wanting to be the gender they are,
however as they will have a trans dad, they will know being trans is something
I will support, if they feel that way.
Will
you be cloth diapering?
Yes. I have dozens of them
already. I went a bit hard on aliexpress. They're so cute though!
Will
you be rehoming your cats/dogs/snake/birds?
No. I will house the snake
in a locked room though, because she is big enough to strangle a grown man and
if the worst happened and she got out, she might smother a baby trying to get
warm.
Are
you dating anyone?
Are you hitting on me? If
you are, you better offer to massage my goddamn feet or stop wasting my time.
Can
I send you a gift?
Thank you! Yes, you can. PM
me for my postal address. Baby and children's books are a huge plus. I have a
lot of cloth diapers and soft toys already, so maybe avoid those, but you can
never have too many books. Please don't buy any gendered clothing (any clothing
you can guess the baby's gender at a glance), or clothing with weird slogans
like 'all the chicks love me' or 'daddy's little girl'.
Thank
You All So Much For Your Support!
For all the support I have
received and for all the support that is yet to come. I have the most amazing
friends (and sometimes family) and I am so grateful for all of you each and
every day.
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