Jake Talks About Lists Again

Obsessive Compulsive Meets Organisation

Anyone who knows me well, knows I have a deep and unhealthy passion for lists. List are life. Lists are love. People also know I am painfully organised. My house is tidy, my days are ordered. And as a result, I am very productive.

This blog post is going to be an insight into how I organise my life and, there are no surprises, its mostly lists. Lists make me happy. They make me content. And I find crossing things off lists to be very enjoyable indeed.

This post is not a suggestion for how you should organise your life. Rather, its just an entertaining insight into me and my system. In fact, I suspect my system wouldn’t suit anyone else, and if it was forced onto someone, they would probably go crazy.

Still, maybe something here will inspire you, or solve a problem you have been grappling with. At the very least, it will give you an entertaining peep into my brain.

Journal

My journal is for my thoughts, my memories and my feelings. It is an exercise in mental health. I put down the good and the bad here, both so I can let it go, and so I can process and analyse what is happening in my life. It helps me make plans, analyse my problems and explore my feelings. I have had dozens of epiphanies writing in my journal. I would say putting myself on paper has changed the course of my life for the better.

I go through a lot of these. On average, one hardback, lined journal every two months. That's about six a year. I do a lot of thinking. And a lot of talking to myself! Some days, I can write 10-15 pages, though the average is closer to 3 pages. That's not to say I journal every single day, but I do make the time a few days a week.

If you are stressed, feeling lost, feeling frustrated, unhappy with your life, or just trying to step your life up to the next level, I strongly recommend journaling. Getting all your thoughts down on paper makes a huge difference. I don't see any point in imposing any rules on yourself. I will say, my favourite time to write is early on rainy mornings, either out on my back deck or in bed—depending on how windy it is.

Either way, even when I am stressed, journaling is a relief, if not a joy. It’s a way of letting go and taking time to get to know myself. It’s the one time I can be 100% honest, knowing I can't be judged. And that is a rare pleasure indeed.

Day Planner

This is for my practical, every day 'to do' list. It keeps my house running, and makes sure I get to appointments and pay bills on time. It is a tool and the workhorse of my productivity. There is nothing poetic or creative about it.

Everything else on this list makes me feel good, or makes me more productive, or cares for my mental health. However, my day planner is vital. Without it, my life would be in complete shambles. Because when I am very ill, I can't remember anything, and because my day planner tracks my medication and if my pets have been fed, my day planner may actually actively keep me and my pets alive.

I actually don't know how people function without a day planner. I can't even imagine it.

What is really important to me, is that my day planner has a full page for every day. Its very frustrating for me when Saturday and Sunday are sharing a page, since my weekends aren't less busy than my week days. When choosing a day planner, think about how your week is structured and spend the time hunting for a planner than suits you. You might even find a digital planner suits you better, but I will stick to my physical book and pens.

Bujo

My bujo is part goals, part inspiration, part monthly plan. I don’t bujo exactly the same as other people—though anyone who insists on bujo 'rules' is just a killjoy. My Bujo is a gorgeous Paperblank hardcover notebook with blank pages. I keep it yearly, so each bujo covers a whole year of my life. It is used to track my yearly goals and projects, which are then further broken down into monthly sections. I include a lot of lists and checklists. Including, but not limited to, places to visit, saving and finance, books I have read, books I want to write, blog post planning, weight and fitness tracking, birthdays of friends and family, wish lists, planting and harvesting guides for my garden, career goals and milestones, & personal goals and milestones.

My bujo is also decorated with stickers, washi tape and hand drawn art. Its not just about tracking, its about inspiring, so its important to me that it looks good. Working on it is a great joy for me, an artistic process and something I do when I want to relax and do something creative.

Bujo is a fantastic hobby for people who love lists and art. Just keep in mind it should be enjoyable. Too many people I see put pressure on themselves to make it 'perfect', or they put such high expectations on themselves that they fall behind in bujo maintenance then are too despondent to catch up again.

I started working on my 2019 bujo in August, planning out the pages I wanted and then the order I wanted them in. I pencilled in the title and page numbers very lightly and over October/November/December I will do the penning and taping for many of the pages—since I am going to be very busy with a baby early in the year, I am hoping to get at least six months prepared in advance.

Often, I will set up pages at the start of the year, then only decorate them as the year progresses. Even if I have finished with them. That's okay too. Bujos are about function and enjoyment. Its not an art competition.

Prayer Book

Every day, instead of praying out loud, I write in my prayer book. These prayers are usually in the form of giving thanks, asking for guidance and asking for God to act on behalf of the people around me who may be struggling.

If you aren't religious, the equivalent would be a gratitude journal, with letters to loved ones.

Personally, my prayer book has a hugely positive impact on my mental health. It teaches me to stop trying to control everything in my life and not obsess quite so much. Its also nice to look back through the pages and see how many of my prayers were answered, and how many things I was worried about that turned out okay.

Obviously, for me, as a Christian, it is a deeply personal connection with my faith. Its not really something I would recommend for others, unless the idea brings you joy and excitement. Its not going to make you more organised, either way!

Business and Writing Plan

This is my only digital file. I keep it in scrivener and it is broken into several parts.

Website

Social Media & Promotion

Novel Length Projects

Shorts and Novella Length Projects

Vision Writers

Non-Career Items

These are straight up lists of things I need to do, broken down into manageable/practical steps that can be added, one at a time, to my day planner.

In the Writing Plan, a novel might look something like this:

TITLE – First Draft

TITLE – Second Draft

TITLE – Feedback and Beta Readers

TITLE – Third Draft

TITLE – Synopsis and Query

TITLE – Submit to Agents

In my day planner, I might put 'Title – First Draft' down a my primary goal for several months, while I write it. But once it is done, it gets crossed off in the Writing Plan and the next day, the primary item in my day planner is 'Title – Second Draft'. And plodding along in that manner keeps me productive and on track.

In each section, Website, Vision, Novels, etc, everything is listed in the order I want to complete them. So, I always know that, in each section, I work from top to bottom to achieve my goals. There is, however, a LOT of things in this file. Probably enough work for at least the next five years, if not the next ten. And that's okay. Its fantastic to have a clear idea of where I am going.

None of it is set in stone, I can review and change it whenever I like. Things get moved around a lot—just not in mid project. Once I start, I commit to finishing.

Conclusion

There you go! Insight into the way I track and organise my life. Inspiring? Terrifying? You tell me. The important thing is, I have a system that works with my life. Whatever you do, you need the same.

And stay tuned, the newsletter, synopsis series and new website is coming! I promise.

Setting New Years Goals To Make Yourself Happy In 2018

New Year's Goals, Not New Year's Resolutions

 

These days everyone is very hostile toward the idea of New Year's Resolutions for some reason. I've heard people say: 'I can change any day, I don't want to wait until new years' or 'new year's resolutions never last'.

That's fine, I'm talking about goals. And I think having goals for the year is important. It's hard to get where you want to be if you don’t know where that is.

What's Your Motivation?

Why do we do things? Everything we do, every single thing, is to avoid pain and seek gratification. That's not to say we are all hedonists. We often suffer through painful things we believe will give us greater happiness in the long run. For example, I don't know many people who enjoy university assignments, but we imagine getting a good grade and getting our degree with allow us to get a job that makes us happy.

On the other hand, sometimes we avoid small things which would make us happier in the long run, because there is a discomfort barrier in our way. Maybe we must make an uncomfortable phone call to get our money back on a faulty item. We know having our money back would make us happier, but the stress of confrontation stops us from doing it.

As I said, everything we do is about avoiding pain and seeking gratification.

But What Is Happiness?

So, I am going to assume that your goals, whatever they are, are ultimately about you wanting to be happier. Losing weight, getting a boyfriend/girlfriend, reading more, cooking more, finishing your novel—you imagine these things will make you happy. No one has the New Year's Goal of getting into debt or becoming depressed, we know those things would decrease our overall happiness.

However, before we can work out what will make us happy, we must define happiness, which is not as simple as it sounds. I prefer Paul Dolan's definition in Happiness by Design: 'Happiness is experiences of pleasure and purpose over time'.

Purpose and pleasure. Not just pleasure. For example, maybe you don't really enjoy exercising, but it gives you a strong sense of purpose that is rewarding. And maybe you enjoy watching reality TV, there I a lot of pleasure in it, but you don't get a sense of purpose from it. There are also double negatives, like being forced to do work you know will ultimate be discarded. And hopefully double positives, walking your dog, for example, which is both pleasurable and purposeful.

Obviously, as much as possible, we need to steer ourselves toward activities that give us both pleasure and purpose, and avoid activities that give no pleasure or have no purpose. Its also important, to maximise our happiness, that we have a balance between pleasure and purpose. If you do nothing but play video games, you are not likely to be very happy, even though they are pleasurable.  Likewise, if you do nothing but work, you are unlike to be happy, even if your work gives you a strong sense of purpose.

In this blog post I am going to suggest five sequential personal assessment and development exercises that will help you choose and achieve positive goals for 2018 that will truly make you happy in the long run.

Exercise One:

This brings us to exercise one. I want you to write four lists. Each list should have about twenty activities on it, but you can as many more as you want. The activities should include all the things you do in a week (or even month) and all the things you wish you did.

- List 1: Activities that give you pleasure:

- List 2: Activities that are not enjoyable:

- List 3: Activities that give you a sense of purpose:

- List 4: Activities that feel pointless:

Every activity should appear on two of your lists. Because every single activity should be either pleasurable or unenjoyable, and purposeful or pointless. Some examples of activities could include:

- Cleaning = Unenjoyable/purposeful.

- Exercising = Unenjoyable/purposeful.

- Reading (educational) = Unenjoyable/purposeful.

- Reading (fiction) = Enjoyable/pointless.

- Watching TV = Enjoyable/pointless.

- Writing = Enjoyable/purposeful.

- Gardening = Enjoyable/purposeful.

- Angry tweeting racists = Unenjoyable/pointless.

- Watching the news = Unenjoyable/pointless.

It helps to put as many things as possible on these lists, as it will aid you with the following exercises a lot.

Exercise Two:

If you could go back in time five years and do some things differently, what would you change? Would you have started a savings account? Put more effort into your marriage? Made more time for your kids? Made more time to write your book? Started university? You might want to write a list of these for clarity.

You should never put something off because of how long it will take. The time will pass anyway, the only difference is, if you will have that thing you desire at the end of it.

- So, I want you to write a list. In five years' time, what things do you think you will regret not doing now?

There is a meme that is very popular now that says something like: "People are so intent on the idea that if they went back in time, small changes could have huge ramifications to the present, why don't they think about the small changes they make now that could have huge ramifications on the future?"

Change your future now.

Exercise Three:

Okay, we're finally here. Time to start thinking about 2018. Now you have a few important lists ready. You have a list of things that give you pleasure, a list of things that give you purpose, and a list of things you think you will regret not doing.

Now is the time to go nuts. Write a list of all the things you would like to achieve in 2018. Note I said: 'like to achieve' not 'plan to achieve'. This is not our list of new years goals, this is a list of all our possible new years goals. And I want it to include the bad things you want to get rid of: like cutting down your commute and spending less time on Facebook. Or the bad things you have been putting off, like finally writing a letter to a parent to tell them how much they failed you.

But also include all the things that you love and that give you a sense of purpose, even if they scare you. Want to start your own business? Move to another country? Cut down your carbon footprint? Go vegan? It all goes on this list.

Make this list long. Longer. Keep going until you can't think of a single other thing you would like to achieve.

Exercise Four:

Its time to curate. I want you to choose three goals from that list. They must meet three criteria:

1. They must be doable in a year.

2. They must be something that will improve your overall happiness.

3. They should be big, not something you can knock out in a weekend.

These are going to be your primary 2018 goals. Congratulations! Are you scared? If you aren't, you've aimed too low.

Exercise four is about writing down the steps to achieve these three goals. Keep breaking down each step into smaller and smaller pieces. How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. Ideally, you want to break down every single step into blocks that would take an hour, then do, perhaps, four blocks a day over your different goals. Depending on your goals, this planning and breaking down step could take a long time, but it will be worth it.

If your goal is to lose 10kgs (like me) your steps might look something like this:

- Plan meals for week one with shopping list.

- Plan meals for week two with shopping list.

- Plan meals for week three with shopping list.

- Plan meals for week four with shopping list.

- Plan meals for week five with shopping list.

- Plan slowly increasing exercise routine for 1-10 weeks, cumulating in a plateaued daily exercise routine of 30 minutes of stretches/sit ups/squats and 1km on the treadmill.

- Shop for week one meals.

- Begin daily routine of cooking meals from plan and following exercise schedule.

- Weekly weigh in on Tuesday.

- Weekly grocery shop on Tuesday.

Come hell or high water, you are going to throw everything you have into achieving these three goals in 2018. You will succeed or kill yourself trying. You have a plan, it is in easy to manage steps, and you know achieving these goals will make you a happier person.

I believe in you.

Exercise Five: Optional

If you are like me, there were a lot of smaller things on your possible list of 2018 goals that are good, productive but not vital. It might be worth writing a secondary list of things you will try and achieve, so long as they don’t take time away from your primary goals. For me, that was things like:

- Read 20 novels/books.

- Read or donate everything on my 'to be read' shelf.

- Read my goals every day.

- Write in my journal every day.

- Go to the beach once a week until it is too cold to swim.

- Brush the dogs in the evening while I am watching TV.

These are all things that will make my life better, make me happier and are generally positive, but I am not going to beat myself up if I don't achieve. I will still do my best to complete them—though since most of them are just doing things with a certain regularity, rather than, an actual goal that can be achieved, they are not suitable 'New Year's Goals'.

Feel free to write your own list of these, and put that list where you can see it. These are all on my Habitica page somewhere, and I have the full list written in my new 2018 Day Planner, so I can check it whenever I have spare time to kill.

So that's it. My guide to 2018 Goals That Will Make You Happier. I hope these exercises made a difference for you, and helped you in some way. And I hope you have an amazing 2018!